After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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