At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Just puked most of my soul out..
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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