Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
