Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
