Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
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