Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
