I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
