I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
i think my tv is drunk
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
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