I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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