i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize