big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
