...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize
