oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
