Dual....:-)
1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Randomize
