Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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