I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize