Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
