Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Randomize
