I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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