Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
never play flip cup with pint glasses
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Mom said you looked used
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Randomize
