..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
