help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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