I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
vagina is talking i cant
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
organizing the empties. That sober.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
