You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
