How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Randomize
