I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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