oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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