If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
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