he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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