Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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