and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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