your thong is hanging out like whoa
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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