I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
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