i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
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