I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
