YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
