Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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