Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
