i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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