Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I need a beard to bite.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
