Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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