I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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