i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
