she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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