talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
