And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Randomize
