My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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