I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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