AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Randomize
