Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
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